The God Connection

My God Relationship
Future Time Two



"So when did you realize the connection?" said MV. "You know, getting
hooked up with the big guy, the one on high?"

"When I finally stepped back and took in the whole meaning of what I
was thinking," I replied. "At first the X/Y form was about how freedom
existed in a world of cause and effect, but as it developed, it became
impossible not to notice its religious significance. In fact, making
that connection was a very small step indeed."

"How so," said MV.

"Well, it wasn't hard to infer the existence of God when you consider
that existence is really expressed freedom, and sense everything that
exists does so as an expression of freedom, then something must be
free. I suppose you don't have to infer that God exists from that, but
what other option is there?"

"That must have been a shocker," replied MV, "a real leap of faith."

"Not really," I said, "Actually, experience, and that experience in
particular, takes place in two ways. The first way is like in reading
a book. I guess that's what we're doing right now--information
processing. After an explanation, a nod of agreement is expected, but
even with supporting evidence, vigorous debates are sometimes
necessary before agreements are forthcoming. However, there is another
level, a first-person level of experience that requires no leap at all.

"Typically, when I describe an experience I am not inside the
experience—but I can be. When I am in pain, and say as much, there is
no disconnect. My word's—`why me,' and body language, erase any doubt
that I am right there, front and center in the experience of the pain
that I am describing. To be sure, in the beginning, that was not the
way I experienced the X/Y form; then the knowledge/feeling experience
was not a first person experience. However, at a later date, I did
actually experience my `I-consciousness' merge with the `presence of a
self-aware God in the here and now,' and that, for me, was a shocking.
Eventually, I came off of that high, but there was never
any going back after that.

"Put another way, it works like this: God resides in my temporal
present as an all-knowing self-awareness, but I do not (usually)
experience self-awareness this way. Instead, I experience my own
beliefs, concerns, and intentions; I experience my past and my future
in terms of my own thoughts, words, and deeds. `All that is me,' says
the X/Y form, `is an affirmation,' and `all that is not me' says the
X/Y form, `is also an affirmation—an affirmation that takes place in
the ‘God space of logical implication.' Thus (and this is a really huge
thus), when the meaning of this state of affairs becomes clear,
responsibilities shift from my own personal relationship to myself, to
the more overwhelming relationship of `my relationship' to God's
self-awareness, i.e., my God relationship. This may sound strange, but
there is a common analogue to this relationship, an analogue to my
personal relationship with God through self-consciousness, --and it is
expressed in the Gestalt figure/ground images.